Showing posts with label motherhood. Show all posts
Showing posts with label motherhood. Show all posts

Sunday, May 8, 2016

Your get away with anything day: for Moms




Mothers Day Fun

Moms, it's your day:  you officially get to look however you want (facials beware) say, share or post whatever you feel like without recourse from kids who get all bent out of shape because they absolutely forbid you to post or say anything that could draw attention to them or embarrass them.

A free pass
You have a forgiveness card that expires by midnight today.  For starters, I am going to begin with a rant.  Logging on I see Google's image for the day and I stare in horror :: how can a Mother's Day image have dad's tassled shoes? Horror.

Google gasp
How could they?  I mean seriously.  Any respectful, fashionista mother is a clothes horse and shoe-a-holic.  What a big booboo that is beyond kissing better. Yes, we've come a long way from being Betty Crockers in the kitchen.  We're a force to be reckoned with if you dare threaten her family and be beneath respectful to her and her kin.  

Google could have at the very least posted a pair of flip flops.  If they had gone out of their way, they would have found a pair of tasteful sandals that would make any lovely lady of motherhood drool over.  



Official "guilt free shopping day"
Ohhhh, one in every color day!  I hope mothers uniting at least finish reading this commentary before rushing out to do embrace their guilt-free shopping day.

Mom's Brag Book
Ok, Moms, grab that brag book and start posting those photos of your kids, brag about their accomplishments and let er rip!  Today is your day to get away with anything day.  What the world calls "Mothers Day" is your day to be who you want to be, do what you wanna do and say what you wanna say!

Have your say ::
I'm darn proud of my kids, just like each and every one of us.  Some days they challenge me while others they give me bursting pride that I could be responsible for creating such wonderful human beings.  Amazing how some of that nagging and guidance pays off.

My son inspires me every day
I was robbed of a normal celebration when he was born.  The nurses and doctors scattered and fussed over the minute he was born.  Imagine having your newborn with needle marks in his head because they wanted to figure out what was going on.  He was born with a rare genetic diagnosis that even specialists couldn't quite predict what life he would have unfold.
A hole in his heart, physically unique footprint, along with a number of other concerns.

Imagine bursting onto the motherhood front and you had to ramp up your protectiveness ten fold, when he was starting sniffles meant you were heading for the emergency department, having heart surgery at 13 months old.



Paul Brandt
Kyle taught me that the cup is always half full.  You should never dwell on what ifs and feel joy at all the what as.   During one of those emergency trips to the Children's Hospital in Calgary, he was treated to the rare care of a male nurse of all things.

What was even more miraculous was this nurse had just won a singing talent contest in Nashville, Tennessee.  Paul has gone on to be the greatest Canadian country artist of all time and  to this day (think Juno, think megastar).   Paul gave a gift to a scared young mother, his spirit and humor.  I remember him sharing things about himself that I share with fondness.  One revelation being that he was actually born named:   Paul RennĂ©e Belobersycky on July 21, 1972 (age 43).

Paul is lending his celebrity to help victims of the Fort McMurray wild fires, retweeting stories, offering other support.  Have a listen to this song that epitomizing the evacuation of this northern oil city:




Today, Kyle is known for his eternal optimism.  People, peers, teachers all exclaim: "I love Kyle" whenever his name comes up.  

Genetics aside reKNOWN 
One would think that a kid with those kinds of challenges, experienced bullying, had life saving surgery, and limitations physically galore, disrespected by employer with only $12.25 an hour after 8 years of service.  

Genius reSOUNDing
Kyle has found the voice for the #Mellennial generation.  He has the knack for seeing something and sharing it because it hit his coolness radar.  

Queer
Mostly oddly are unique and queer:  in a way that only the 80s gurus know that queer meant cool at that time in our lives.  So strange to discover that a word my generation resonated by would be exhumed to mean something so discriminatory and offensive a word :: eh?

I digressed again ::
I get sidetracked by an insight that is so profound I digress.  Let the mind sing and churn out only the "bestofeverything" :: #bestofeverything ::

Appreciation ::
It so easy to fall in love with Kyle :: the love that is universally channeled by motherhood :: sisterhood :: friendship :: cousin :: brother :: when Kyle gets something or anything, he has the magnetic gift of appreciation.  

Appreciation is something you can mimic enough that you start to feeling it from deep inside.  Emerging a guru who's spell you fell under :: Kyle, @flamesboy4eva get sidetracked by an insight that is so profound I digress.  Let the mind sing and churn out only the "bestofeverything" :: #bestofeverything ::

A strong conscience 
If there is anything that shows the story behind the story is one person who will emerge:: +Kyle S who has this seemingly giant perception radar on what is horribly unfortunate yet all too apparent in our society:  #corruption :: if there is any drum to bang on, Kyle has the uncanny knack for exposing it.  He took the guidance of a mother's continued nagging, repeating and repeating:  do not complain about your government if you're not prepared to do your civic and democratic right to vote.  Fond memory I recall is a discussion amongst my children on a warm summer's day ::

I would always begin with a celebratory atmosphere based merely on a whim :: hardly a birthday or annual event to create such excitement :: where I would set up the table on the patio, put up the Umbrella, in anticipation of the mere pleasure of having company.

Keeping them curious
Politics was something I started talking with my kids early about.  It is funny looking back at how each of them have convictions or causes that resonate within each of them :: feminism, corruption, mental health :: began at those early spirited gatherings.  I wouldn't have known of any secret motherhood ingredient I was giving my children :: keeping them curious.

Regardless of whether they could vote being that it was a good decade away, they were encouraged to have a voice on what is wrong with this world?  The earliest memory of Chantal was the detail I went through with gut-wrenching honesty, the list of items retrieved and inventoried on a list that was to go back to school the next day :: my very first, and maybe the first environmentalists of the #Millennial generation. 

Charitable causes the norm
Imagine my pure pleasure and surprise that should give her a pass for having a home that cared about its planet.  That is because coffee grounds, vegetables, fruit rinds, peelings, soup, meat, gravy, moldy bread, sour milk, burt something, failed recipe, were always put garburator  to work.   The cans were rinsed in a Rubbermade bucket (long before the engenius inventor of a blue recycle bin, talk about explosive idea for this generation to the next).  I am definitely sure that it was before plastics were recycled except milk 2 litres recycling at bottle depots.  That was before grade schools asked for donations of buckets for crafts and pop caps for charitable causes were even considered BTW (twitter-ese for 140 characters or less).


A louder voice
These open ended hearty discussions were encouraged and embraced.  Looking back now, I see how it could boost Kyle's confidence that his opinion mattered and was his purest gift ::  if there is a cause that is because of corruption, you will not hear a louder voice.

Good stock
Kyle is at the front of the line recognizing the attributes he inherited from his parents :: from me he says my outgoing friendliness and optimism :: times at least a dozen.  From his father, a work ethic, financial responsibility, and commitment.  And just this Mother's Day Kyle is confidently sharing the gifts he received from his stepfather named "Rob".  He said it was his sarcastic, dry humor.  That, and the fact that they both seem to like the same games and are gamers together. 

Talk about wisdom
If you are having trouble communicating with your Millennial sons, and the admitted desire to want to reach out and connect, you should try the ingredient that Rob and Kyle have discovered :: you can't go merely through the motions however.  You have to dedicate yourself like you have never before to find a way you will enjoy gaming with a world to uncover. 

It is a secret world
Where escapism meets participation via gaming.  A social (perhaps hidden) personality who had more to give and share by unmasking imagination and team work.  Where the testosterone is checked at the door.  Where men could safely become men and male examples rise to the top.  


To be continued ...... (daughters beware)







Sunday, January 24, 2016

Lil bit of attitude


"Oh, my, this one has attitude!" exclamed the delivery nurse.  Who may have been saying "here's another one" to the tired, adrenaline-rushed parents of this newborn creation ..... of theirs.

 A mixture of disbelief and amazement as this gaze upon this near perfect little human girl.  Minutes from being in a warm, comfortable womb.  Indignant at the harsh introduction she hadn't anticipated she let out a howl.

This little beauty grew and grew:  and sang "take me out to the Ball Game" at a mere 16 months.  As a party favor, she blasted through the adults polite conversation, as their jaws dropped and gaped open at a special experience unfolded.  Discussion began.  How amazing is it that a little burst of energy could sing to the rafters, in such abandon, glorying in the musical flutes her own tonsils gave. Oblivious to the expressions of anyone around her.  She liked bursting out and singing.  Her abandon to anything akin to self-conscious expression.  The audience crossed between envy and awe.  How could such a little thing stand up, be so proud, and sing with such abandon?  At ONLY 16 months.

The parents who were always ready with a video camera were stunned into inaction.  The musical notes combined with gusto and self-exuberance.  How could they have created such a ... umm... creature?  Alas, it was a daughter.  They should have had their seat belts tightened.  Yet they didn't do anything. Why should they?  They weren't puppeteers, merely creators.  

They wondered, however, how can they take credit for such a beauty with such a powerful voice? 

As the little girl developed and continued to grow became as ever a sight to behold.  At 2, this confident, clever,  creation would insist that she was a princess.  Her hard-working mother and father fascinated, would wonder:  how could a princess be born and insist she was one.  They  were, although not average folk, wondered how they could be responsible for this envisioned little lady?  

Then, one day, when the father was away at work, slagging dragons called life and career, the mother bent over a captive keyboard for job.  A nanny, on call, living out, ever present, vacuuming the castle always to shine, was focussed on leaving a tread in the carpet, hadn't noticed her charge, who had transformed into an escapee to her mother's home office.  Sneaking in, quietly, taking and absorbing every last detail.  Alas, the mother noticed the scamp in her midst.  The little joy did ask: "Mommy, what are you doing?"

Lest the mother cause disillusionment of the responsibility of working and career, she tenderly said:  "I am working.  When you grown up, you will likely work too.  What is it that you think you'll do too?

The predictable reply did unfold "why, when I am grown up, I will be a princess!" Said with such convincement, less mortal men or mothers would never argue.  However, the mother did sigh.  She then glanced around, realizing that the King was not home nor was the princess' guard on command.

She did try to dispell the disillusionment which chance had burst, said to her darling daughter with such thirst, for life, for dreams, goals and confidence:  "why Sweetie, you will be princess when I am a queen!"  Rationalizing that being realistic of drastic importance.

Then to her utter dismay her daughter did respond:  "Why mommy, I didn't know that you were a queen!!"

The days grew onwards and upward the girl grew, when tragedy did brew.  The media, the news, the television, no matter how one flew, protested the death of a princess many thought they knew.

When dinner one day, was being prepared by her mother.  As the news and the television broadcast the cover:  A princess died while so many fed .. on the photos, paparazzi with the princess photos they led.  How sad to have such a wonderful soul cut short, would end up causing this young four-year-old lady to retort:  "That is so sad to hear about the princess."

The mother, astonished, that this little girl wisdom, attuned to the news and the stories that bloomed.  She asked her daughter, in parenting skills on high alert, how do you feel about this story?  The daughter said "Sad".  The mother now curious, nowhere near mad.  Asked her little one why would she say so.  When the gem said "well, I am a princess, so this one I should know".

This is a reflection of a mother, rediscovering the journey she started with her daughter.  She has just turned 23, in second year of university, dedicated to  fine arts, art history and philanthropy.  

A mother's pride never diminishes with age.  If anything, it flourishes as cheerleading captain of her daughter's journey.  

Happy Birthday sweet, beautiful daughter O mine.