Showing posts with label moods. Show all posts
Showing posts with label moods. Show all posts

Thursday, February 18, 2016

The one that got away ....

I was having this conversation with my sister the other day.  Heaven help me if I even remember what our train of thought may have been... do you have a sister that you really relate to even though your worlds may seem so far apart?  

                 STOP and have a listen, or play while you read on through 

My sister is as opposite of me as the world could even imagine:

  • she was born in the autumn and I in the Spring
  • we saw our growing up differently: she full of pain; me full of belief
  • while I can come across gregarious she could come across as calm and reasoning
  • our relationships, kids, friends are friends of each other too - they find it easier to like the other
  • you enjoy shopping together and would never imagine skydiving - although one would have if she thought about it while the other wouldn't have dared (me).
  • you both reach for the same things even if our home, our taste, would seemingly be different
Sidetracked again.  Apologies ... then what the heck do you expect of me by now?   It appears as though I have writing AHSD.  Thank goodness not in real life:  I can be excruciatingly organized and detailed while consciously trying not to be so the opposite is perceived.

This is what the conversation was about: the one that got away.  How bizarre eh?

Two sisters of 18 months apart in their fifties having an absurd reminiscence.  Opposite memories, no doubt.  She talked and I listened for a change.  Yeh, not a regular occurrence by any means.

My conscious memory a week later pops this into my head as I'm driving home.  I know I listened carefully.  I am really trying to be a better listener, which is not a natural state.  

She talked about this boy that she really liked when she had run away from home.  As much as she seemed like a radical from candy-coated pink 15-year-old eyes, I seem more like a rebel now that I've hit my 50s.

The memory went on in the manner that this sort does:  what would have or could have happened if she had not broken his heart and stayed with him.  

Astonishing!  The responsible, loving, caring mother, daughter, sister or aunt, was actually rewinding life to check back and check in to what she thought she'd be doing once she hit her 50s.  

STOP and have a listen, or play while you read on through 

So many wondrous movies are about going back in time, less about heading into the future.  It must be a creative dream, to take a situation and from the current state, to what had happened, and how things may have gone differently.  I now realize that the surprise in store for the reader or viewer, is will the hero or heroine return to the current state much differently or very much the same with differences.

That is such  a creative morsel of temptation.  Take a situation or moment in your life, and fast rewind and slowly play forward.  Taking the audience on a ride that even you may not predict.  Will you return differently or much the same with differences ...

What do I mean?  My sister  ... was doing that in a sense.  She was wondering if she had stayed with that very nice boy, not broken his heart, and stayed together.  She wasn't evaluating it, nor was she suggesting that she was disatisfied with how things turned out.

 It was a simple, honest meandering .... My sister  was highlighting what we go through when we hit or 40s and 50s.  We really aren't all that different than we were in our teens.  The ride we'd be on at the time would result in whether we are currently on the ride of our lives, or too conservative.  Or, some of us would recall that maybe they could have been a little bit braver or self-confident at our teens.  Others of us blossom as life and the years make us milder, more content.  While others of us become restless and want to step out.

What would your comfort zone and would you have done things differently then and end up different somehow? 

I am torn between staying the same or being more carefree.  How does one's homelife be the same and yet be reacted far apart?  

I couldn't have imagined things getting any worse so I would madly try to be an over-achiever.  Perhaps some experts would say that was because I was a fighter and did whatever it would take to have a life that would erase anything.  My sister may say that she was acting it out.  

Deal with it now is what most would applaud.  Get it out of your system so you can grow up and get on with life.  In a measured, grounded, spiritual way.  

If you bottle it up you may never know when it will sprout. Maybe that is what they mean by mid-life crisis?  When it hits or skips over anyone, would be a multi-zillion market.  

Many marketers, services or products  are divided into two groups:

ONE:  Going through mid-life crisis.

TWO:  Not.

Are you meandering about the one who got away?  Examine whether you think things would have turned out differently, or would have it made a difference.

Create a balance between the two:  Don't pine for what may have been.  Instead, create the life now that would be a different you .... or the same you with a little change.

Now this is how I really feel:


Monday, October 12, 2015

Something worth watching: The Killing

Happy Thanksgiving to all my Canadian patriots, friends, family, followers, readers and everyone in between.  Lucky for me, I have the whole weekend off, except Monday. Being in thank-ful mode,  I do appreciate what I am able to.

The kids will be coming over, with the Stepdaughter bringing a ham, my middle daughter, a fruity baked creation (yummm) and my adorable son.  Sadly, my baby is still in Vancouver yet will be celebrating it with my mom, brother, his wife, their daughter and certainly her beau.  We'll see if she heeds my advice from our long chat last night:  to have Matt pick up a bouquet at Safeway and have it split and wrapped into two wrappings (to be economically wise) and have the ladies swoon.

NEEDED:  Someone who can animate or GIFF this?  Full CREDIT .This art was created by Markam Shrak

Why are guys so dumb sometimes?  It IS spelt out to them everything:  in commercials, in the supermarket, on television.  It won't mean anything until they run banners along the bottom of videogames - streaming branding.  Can you imagine Coca Cola do a 15 ministrobe flash on your device - why is it that shortened names to only keep the original names i.e. Coke?

You aren't getting it yet?   This blog was a kinda talking myself out loud thinking some fellow women and sisters would think I was talking with her.  A friend.  Right there.  Hey you felt lost between vegging watching TV and then rolling a joint and then just see what takes shapes.

I seriously should have interjected because my friend Wasp (replaced to protect anonymity)has jumped on the keyboard and chill out with you.
"KEEP SMILING" my ode to you 

You're hear so far.  So, I'm guessing, go far so good.  Woman, girlfriend, daughter, niece, friend, maybe even follower.  You're here because you'r a bit unsettled.  Ajusting to the feeling that age is around the corner and it's really scary.

Hunkster Hubster and I first started marathon watching, or binge watching was when he had a much younger set of kids.  Four of them living together, our roof.  Me and the hunkster hubster figured out pretty soon that our really awesome individual kids were great big panksters whenever we never around.  On each other, an innocent communication to get attention.

Every time we have them over.  There always seem to be a new tale.  I started it about 7 years ago when Hunkster Hubster and I had a family.  His one daughter who was a fifteen year old that it amazed me could walk with that big giant chip on her shoulder weighing her down.  Times like that were such good times.  These sidebars will be my saviour.  Saving my ass from going on a tangent of nothing relevant to what I'm writing, but a burst of a though or memory that needs to be shared.  This wisdom that I imparted to all my three daughters have worked out.  Desiree is getting married next summer.  She is marrying a super buy.  If you were to try to set up the perfect guy and get by order, wouldn't that be something.  I don't know how many times I've told them all that they are going to have to kiss a lot of toads before you find the worthy one.  The worthy one is who I am going to define men in your lives as such:

  • Bread winners:  they make decent money (nix millionaires)
  • They like their music:  but they are not necessarily musicians because I perceive being in a committed relationship with a musician would be really hard. Often they are so good looking they could be looked at twice, having others think he must be a retired rock star.
  • They are good with their hands:  Well, ummm, this is no Sisters Shades of 50 Grey.  I guess, unless that is one of the topics we want to explore.
  • Alrighty then.  Forcing myself, and if you're still ready, probably to think of the asshole(s) who broke my heart.  That was like a splash of cold water, cool awakening.

I need you to have a listen to this music video.  Have a lot of good vibes watching it.  If it makes you want to stand and dance, just go ahead and doing.  Hunkster hubster is fast asleep on the couch.  Hogging the remote in case I grab it to watch "Magic Mike with Tatam hearthrob what's his name.  F*** I always transposed that:  Channing Tatam.

Plenty of you out there.  I guess you're the same.  You are a pretty good person, work oriented, kids oriented, family oriented, smart, curious, inquisitiveness, creative, idea persons, musicians, artists, players, actors, You believed that whole getting married in the 80s means.  Ha ha ha ... t'would appear I'm assembling my audience.  Are they going to come check this out and subscribe willingly:

Carry on reading now as we both listen to the song together.  So, it's going to be the new Women's Conspiracy Theory.  A group of women by invite who dispense their own conspiracy theories on life, women in career, Lean In Chicks, Life Coaches and really around basic nice, smart lady thing you have going on.  Listen honey, they're looking for tigers all around you and themselves and all they see is those tigers.  Yet there you are, in the very midst of all of them and are unique.  Not in a wallflower, stand and tap music kinda of a thing.  More like day dreaming about this sort of thing:

So what do you normally do on a Sunday night?  And way way back to my starting to watch marathon movie shoes.  I'm blasted away and so surprised.  The Killing is the best I've watched since Sons of Arnarcy (what the heck, how do you spell that think??)  and before SAMCRO (that's easier) it was BREAKINGbad.  Somewhere in the midst of it, we realized that with the new OPTIK TV (copyright TELUS) we can rewatch series that were televised, not that very long ago the wonderkind emergences of #Netflix.

Now, I'm really not what you would call your typical TV or MOVIE watcher.  I didn't start watching movies or on TV until I hit 50.  Stop falling on the ground and yank yerself to your feet, you dumb moron.

I rarely watch TV.  I was born in 1961.  We started living in Germany by 1969.  Norm was an airforce avionics specialist.  Take that stat now.  What are the chances that my dad chose a career in the military that universities weren't even carrying yet.
He was the equivalent of a phD in that field. 

There are so many people of its kind out there.  Wasn't big philanthropist take on this cause.  For example, if you have been a sales professional for 15 years with a stellar track record.  They are The Women's Conspiracy.  Only a true member will uncover what their's may be.  Yes, it could be a FOODIE MARKETER SPEAKER manager, educator, performer, administrator. 

 Do we really care?  We're going to hang out and read, write, watch and collectively decide what matters.  If I create other sites where we women decide what matter.  We don't need admirable Mrs. Obama, Ms. Fiorini , Lean In *insert name* Oprah Winfrey (respectfully).  I think we're a little bit more special.  We're a fraternity of girls who have grown into women, have had a women's lib melt down once or twice before. 

We've been on a rollercoaster ride during our lives and now we've come around to be inspirators, creators, artists, poets, writers, journalists, beauty designer, clothes brands, shoe fettishes, and way too many pieces.  Now don't force me to give up buying accessories:  which we gave birth, in the sixties no less on offcast of groovy styles while we had mothers who first appeared as the wife in Mad Men *insert name*.  

So are you keen?  Are you a Woman Conspiracy Theorist?  Let me know. If I like your blog (blogs that help on life matters, foodies, beauty, fashion, artists, creators, artists, musicians, vocalists, poetry or lyrics.  If you want to be here, find me.

Even if you won't ever come back and read or visit again, I sure hope you had as much of a blast as I did making this tonight.  Yeppers, after midnight when all accountants, lawyers, construction workers, administrators, stocktraders, sales professionals, transportation drivers, barge captain or professional athlete .... we be all up writing, listen to music, flipping through videos, reading up on the latest interest.  Sharing a sleeplessness of how is tomorrow going to be?  

Growing up in the 60s/70s you hit your stride in the 80s.  LOL at those styles, good heavens.  I bet you're a bit of a style horse still.   We were kids in the most optimistic of times.  All our dads were working, our moms sometimes while often taking care of the family was her full time job ad priority.  Our personal wellbeing, a direct advertisement on how life has treated you.

Noooooooooooooooo, I don't want to bet you.  GHEeshh.  That's not who I am.  I'm a direct talker.  Imagine that, I decided right then I no longer wanted to ever see, read or write "direct shooter" again.  Why would I listen to to the news being devastated as though it happened to me.  I think I was given an extra dose of empathy from my creator.  

So how else can I attract a strong, dynamic, smart, professional, got the world by the *alls, and know you haven't done your very best "thing".  Have you figured out what that is?

Well, I know the main thing.  We can't do it alone can we?  The sidebars on my Blog page can always be updated, even if I can't always right as much as I'd love to.  There will some among of us that would like to jump in.  Respond.  Say what you think?  Can we create an online fraternity of women who are beyond average, have a lot to offer, and with the right support and mentoring by the right role models.

The rules will be very few but unbendable, without exception a forum for gender rights, feminism, and female issues by vote.   As your leader, scribe, and promoter, I will profess to promise to be a good example for anyone anywhere, without notice.  Not drunk, stoned, lonely or melancholy.  We want to help each other.

We will come up with a pledge so that only those who are voted in and qualify, will be given an emblem to share wherever they want.  As a bumper sticker, on all their social media profiles, author pages, artists pages, musicians pages, We will give each member a chance to present themselves, their bios, their likes, their favorite flowers, movies, music, best ever book they're written, read and highly recommend and why?

Another promise I can almost assure.  If it catches on, we'll create ways that we can identify our members.  That's where I need people who have hidden talents and can get things done.  They'll be SEO pros, IT gurus, CLOUD masters, APP developers, smartphone geeks.

Eek, I guess I went off on a real meandering about a bunch of different things.  I'm sure if I keep coming back and reading, I will want to continue editing it, tweaking it.  More, different photos, quotes and outside links.  Maybe I can make money off of links rather than ADworks from #Google. 

Well, I did include Heinz Tomatoe, maybe they'll dish out some do shopping money because it was an artistic statement used as an example without any intent to infringe on any copyright, and to only use it as a creative example of getting a message across by borrowing an image that captures the point you are making.  In fact, I'm sharing the coolest image I found today ...


My favorite day of the week is Saturdays.  It has long been my chillax day.  The best part is rolling out of bed any where between 9 am and 12:30 pm.  I love it when the Hunkster Hubster has it made and sends our dog, Buddy, upstairs.  Buddy's jobs is to wake me up.  As a natural herder, he is talented at digging his wet cold nose on my face, not liking me, but ending up nuzzled in my neck.  Which is by no ways a way you want to be shock into becoming awake.
Then I do.  

I cannot believe it.  Still, I have meandering and carried on.  Completely omitting the reason why I wrote this Blog.  How the Hunkster Hubster and I forayed into our first binge watching or weekend marathon with The Lord of the Rings.  From his collection.  We were having this conversation where I said I hadn't seen the movie when it was the biggest book of my life:  my Grade 5 teacher Mr. Quinn, started reading it to us every Friday afternoon for the last couple of hours of class.  Then based on behaviour criteria, he  chose one of us students to go to the front of the room and read the next number of chapters of The Hobbit. That person also was given a stamp.  Yes, most of us were engaged, well behaved students, gloriously best with the best teacher, if not ever, the best teacher in its time.  I went on my own and read the Lord of the Rings.  That may have seemed quite an accomplishment for Grade 5, but it launched my love of reading.

Hunkster Hubster is these days playing "Farga" that
driving game that is new to X-Box.  That is, if the Seattle Seahawks are playing on the NFL.  I get to spend an hour to three just looking at what is on the web.  Quite often, I could be on a mission after reading a book that I was so pleased with:  The Girl in the Spider's WEB by David Lagercrantz, who has masterfully carried on the same feel and story as though it were still written by the Stieg Larsson's series that hooked me: "The Girl with the Dragon Tattoo."

Let me see, what draws me first?  I'm going to say Facebook, then Twitter, if Pinterest or Linked IN haven't grabbed me beforehand.  Then I'm Jeannette in just chill mode.  Absorption ready. Eyes sharp for that great image or idea that ignites my imagination. Then this overwhelming feeling takes over like I'm being dragged to either of my blogs and writes something about what needs to be written.

I don't expect you to like every selection of music I chose.  Then again, it is MY blog ... lol, giggles. 

I chuckle, here I went, sidetracked on telling you about the series I highly recommend watching.  I'm a fan of detective, mystery, thrillers, and "The Killing" on NETFLIX is masterful. It grabs you really early on and you are transfixed on the events that unfold.  The trailer won't do it justice.  

Don't be discouraged that there are four seasons.  You will only regret if you don't give it a try.  The acting, script, setting from Seattle should be getting a lot more attention.  True Detective was at the top of the game when they launched it.  But I hardly think those fans will mind watching this one.

I wonder if I'm on the right track?  Will I be able to attract new subscribers or followers?  It sure is a matter of self discipline.  I like what I'm writing, I see how it is evolving and decided what it can be about.

Send me a note on Twitter, Facebook or Google if you're on board and/or whether you want to be  @optioneerJM Women Conspiracy member.  We've got lots to talk about.  My main goal is to help it avoid being a lonely, isolated one.  You know, you can be surrounded by people, do a lot of things, even accomplish a lot.  Where's your safe zone?  

This can be it.  We'll be focussing on the positive force of being pushed into 50.  Neither a Baby Boomer yet likely a parent of a Millinnial.  People should paying attention to us.  We've been squished from both sides.  We're the ones making a difference while faded into the background on the tidal wave of events happening in our world.

It is like an open forum, mic turned on, and people tuned in to what is really going on.  This is not gender specific, it is gender influenced.  The issues facing both ones, are sometimes very similar, and in some unresolved ones.
"Stay inquisitive"
~Jeannette Marshall
Until next time ... have the sweetest of sweet dreams: 



Friday, June 19, 2015

MOOD swinging

Every day is a new day and a new beginning.  What we do with our time is important.  It is one of our most valuable resources.

Yesterday, I talked about getting into the ZEN of living life.  Taking a day to goof off, do nothing but what strikes one's fancy.  We should all have a power down day.  Rethink, regroup and regain momentum for living life to the fullest.

After I wrote the blog about doing nothing but relaxZEN, I made up for it in the evening.  I'm not nocturnal by nature, nor am I an early riser.   Last evening after hubby and I watched an episode of the final season 7 of Sons of Anarchy, I painted a flower pot for the garden, scrubbed the floor - yeah, I know, really related eh?  I didn't mention I was swigging the wine to fuel the creativity and boost the energy.  Admittedly, it hampered my productivity today somewhat.

By golly, I realized, I truly am in the middle of everything:
  • Middle aged
  • Mid career
  • Mid life crisis
  • Mood swinger
  • Menopausal
  • Mother
  • Magnificent
It wasn't a complete waste because I spent a number of times on the phone with my youngest daughter, who moved to Vancouver last August, got a job in 10 days with the top law offices and was let go last week ... something about restructuring, consolidating and seniority decision making.  Right after a booming, glowing performance review the month before.  Yep, that's life.  She'll be 21 next month and is smarter in many ways than I was at her age.

We had a really good chuckle when I referred to myself as the "Fired Master" and she called me the "Fire Queen".  She's already had a number of calls and interviews lined up.  I'm thankful that she calls me every day and when crisis strikes it can be multiple times (it used to be typically boyfriend related, but she has an awesome beau now).

Today, it was about weeding the garden a bit, moving flowers around and touching up the flower pot from wine-induced painting outside the lines. 

When the going gets tough, the tough go shopping was my slogan in my 40s, when hard work paid off with high career which meant hard decisions.  I work now, but it is shift oriented.  I spent my 30s raising kids while climbing the career ladder.  I spent my 40s recoiling from divorce and remarrying.  Now that I've hit 50, I want everything to be about balance.  It doesn't matter any more if I have a title.  What is important is doing a good job .... taking what I have preached to my kids for years:  it doesn't matter whether you're the janitor or the boss, do a great job regardless!

Oh, I better get going.  I have a sizzling dinner on the BBQ:  boneless, skinless chicken that had been marinating in a jar of gluten free Satay sauce with white potatoes and salad.  I took pride in using the fresh herbs I started growing last year that makes the mouth water and adds such magnificent flavor.

Great news about chocolate considered a dairy product - I didn't realize that chocolate was part of the daily food group.  Who doesn't love chocolate?  (Anyone who isn't menopausal and gives a rats ass about diet).

I guess my mood today is more about being helpful and healthy.  On that tone, I added favorite blogs to Meanderings.  There are some that have been favorites for years (i.e. Animated Woman and Rodney Pikes) with a few newly discovered to share.  It goes with the helpful, healthy mood today.