Lest we forget .... or NOT

Happy Remembrance Day to my fellow Canadians and anyone else who takes the time today to honor the bravery of all soldiers who fight for freedom and peace.

My father passed away 5 years ago and up to his last breath, was proud of who he represented, after 35 years with the Canadian Armed Forces. In our home, we were unable to forget.

Lt.-Col. John McCrae, author of the famous poem 'In Flanders Fields,' wrote the iconic work after the death of a friend during the second battle of Ypres in the spring of 1915. (National Archives of Canada/Canadian Press) SOURCE CBC Canada 

This year marks the 100th Anniversary of one of the most well known poems "In Flanders Field" by Lt-Col John McCrae.  

The poem is a poignant reminder to us.  If not for the bravery of many men and women, our lives would not be the same today.  It reminds us that those people were brothers, sisters, sons, daughters, aunts, uncles, and grandparents who gave up their lives for others.

We lived, felt dawn, saw sunsets glow,

Loved and were loved, and now we lie

in Flanders Field.

In peacetime, we can all assume that the life of our military personnel are laid back, living day to day in simplicity and beyond the toils of having a corporate or artistic path.  Yet, those who are given glimpses, with guarded privacy and confidential, there were and are still many who are sent on missions or tasks to uphold our freedom.  They are not heralded as heroes and are obscure from the media eye that they too have done much to keep the evils of war at bay.  Our safety taken for granted.

These same men and women should also be honored because they are behind the scenes to keep us safe daily.  A day like Remembrance Day should also celebrate those who are never credited for what they encounter, what they do, in order to keep our lives safe and carefree.  

As the daughter of my father, I know he went away for days, weeks or even months on assignment.  It was the way of life, without questioning why.  Unlike those who drive into an office, maybe work late, and come home at the end of their day, our military is often tasked with going away to do exercises, safety missions and peacekeeping.  Some don't come home.  They are a statistic and number who don't come home.   Only the family and loved ones left to grieve.  While politicians, media may have a glimpse of their bravery, they often go unheralded for what they continue to represent.

I am not minimizing the cause or bravery that stemmed the poignant poem of "Flanders Field".  I just want to acknowledge and pay tribute that there are far more unofficial acts of bravery that go unnoticed, while we contently live our lives in the arrogance of safety.  Sometimes, there is a mention by name, but more often grouped in a category that doesn't distinguish them from what they contribute, or the sacrifices their families encounter.  

My skin crawls and the back of my hair stands up whenever someone wants to call me an "Army Brat".  I find it distasteful and disrespectful to what my father had done.  In his twilight years, he wanted to exorcise his memories and told us more stories of his life than we could possibly have known.  The burden my mother had, raising four kids, primarily alone.  My father's return quiet, unassuming and without fanfare.  It was a way of life.  Not anything I would have given up.  I owe it to my father, to celebrate his contribution to our peaceful world.

I love you dad.  I still miss you.  You have not been forgotten.

Want what you have

As I write this blog it evolves.  Primarily experimental or experiential, depending on my writing and who is reading it.  What I include are items that strike my fancy weighed by my mood or circumstances. 

Where we live and how we live are important to many of us.  Creating creature comforts and having the best life has to offer is a priority for many, a reality for the lucky and dreams for others. 

There are destructive emotions we should avoid for our daily health and wellbeing.  They are emotions that can deteriorate and replace a positive outlook outside of events or occurrence that impact us that we cannot control.  For example:

• Envy:  wanting what others have. 
• Jealousy: anger at what others want to possess.
• Resentment:  remorse for opportunities passing by.
• Bitterness:  unable to let bygones be bygones.
• Greed:  possessiveness without sharing.
• Pride:  giving importance to others opinions
• Arrogance:  smugness in accomplishments
• Superiority:  thinking one is better than others
• Vanity:  putting appearance before anything else
• Ego:  destructive self perception
• Emotional:  going from one mood extreme to another
• Conceit:  self absorbed promotion, better than others
• Cruel:  punishing other people or animals; heartless
• Pretentious: braggart, opinionated, loud, boastful
• Intolerant:  rigid boundaries that are limiting
• Prejudice: biased, narrow judgment, racism, stereotype
• Narcissism:  self-motivated by  the obstruction of others 
• Difficult:  demanding, narrow, unrelenting
• Selfish:  protecting opinion and possessions
• Defiant:  Going against the rules, radical, aggressive

There are so many better characteristics we should aspire to replace or offset the destructive ones:

• Humility:  putting others accomplishments ahead
• Modesty:  non bragging on achievements
• Forgiving:  allowing others wrongs to be undone
• Charitable:  giving of self or possessions
• Understanding:  open-minded, permitting others views
• Accepting: allowing other's differences
• Easy going:  flexible, liberal, adaptable
• Admirable:  looked up to by others, a positive example
• Generous: fruitfulness in actions and charitable giving
• Humanity:  putting others first, caring about people
• Philanthropic: using personal resources to gift others
• Positive:  outlook, attitude, viewpoint, example
• Balanced: composed, stable, adjusted, together
• Compliant:  obedience of rules, embrace guidance
• Inquisitiveness:  wanting to learn, accept new knowledge
• Calm:  steady, understanding negativity, even tempered

We're not perfect by any means.  That is why, I imagine, religion, godliness is what some of us aspire to grasp onto when our personal resources are depleted.   I'm not saying having beliefs in religion is a cop out.  What I am saying is having those beliefs gives us permission to look for a better approach to living and life.

We should be careful not to sway too far the other way.  There are some qualities, held in check, that can be good for us.  In many situations, we should have one stabilized with another. Being too far in one direction can hamper or restrict one's life, be harmful to our health, or increase our stress levels:

Shyness:  anxious,  introverted, fearful, withdrawn
Timid:  passive, non-assertive, quiet, silent,
Submissive:  giving up, allowing others control, avoidance
Silent:  Mute, noiseless, inaudible, still hushed,
Intimidated:  allowing others control, afraid, soundless
Victimized:  harmed, casualty, fatality, prey
Rigid:  steadfast to position, belief, opinion, immobile
Placid:  docile, unfeeling, cold
Stressed:  out of control, inability to meet needs, crowded

Ride along with me on this journey. 
Don't tackle everything at once.  If you have heard or sense what others perceive in you, good or bad, right or wrong.  Take one destructive point and take an opposing quality.  By doing so, we will move towards fulfillment, contentment and wellness. 

I thought of this blog when originally thinking to consolidate some of the items I promoted because they attracted my attentions and desires.  I've noticed how well blogs that promote other brands, products, fashions.  So, I included them.  Then I got to thinking that wanting things, looks, materialism can be destructive and how it is all about balance.  For example, if you want a vacation, you may still have obligations or financial restrictions that won't allow you to just book it.  However, having goals are fueled by those desires that drive you to want to reach those things, places, looks.

I think it is healthy to admire things without allowing envy to enter the equation.  That also allows us to give permission to share ideas and embrace others' ideas.  It can bring acceptance or dissatisfaction. 

How we handle it individually is what makes our world open to new possibilities.  Don't beat yourself up because you bond with something pleasing to your eye or opens up new ideas. 

Here are some images that appeal to me:

Big windows where light can seeps in.  Lots of seating for lots of friends and family to hang out at.  I love the soothing blend of the calm colors with the stone and woodwork.

 



 

 

 

Sometimes you just have to get out of the house to be in a peaceful, quaint setting.  I like meeting new people and it is often in a setting with coffee and big comfy chairs.  Sometimes it is just reading the newspaper, a magazine, enjoying a coffee someone else made.

 

 

Solitude is beneficial.  Being extroverted with history of a hectic household, demanding job, putting demands on myself, it is just nice to get away.  A walk on this path is not far off and within reach of me.  Being reminded is healthy.  Being afraid of bears and animals intruding on my wanders is a reality even if it is not necessarily a risk.

 



I won't get into the drama (this time at least) surrounding my vehicle saga.  I've had a Mini Cooper S and a Mercedes and driving a practical Hyundai Elantra right now.  This falls under the "wouldn't it be great to have" category.

This reminded me of when I did the design of my back deck, drawing it out by hand, this was very similar and included a hot tub.  I was a solo-mom at the time and considered all the factors of how practical one would be.  Visions of a bunch of little kids jumping in and splashing around interrupted my image of quietness, glass of wine, soft music.  I was already accustomed to adding another plate or three for dinner.  I wasn't prepared to share something like this.  Then the reality of daily maintenance and ongoing upkeep eliminated it from my list.



I am an admitted clothes horse.  I tend to plan what I am going to wear in advance.  I imagine gaps in colors, accessories and the like to give me an excuse to go shopping.

I am not a grab anything throw it on type of gal.  I do spend time visualizing my wardrobe, accessories, purses and shoes to put together an outfit for usually the next day.  Even if it is just hanging around the house or running errands.  That sounds extreme as I write this.  Well, we all have our perks and quirks.

I rediscovered Polymore because it appeals to that part of me that likes to imagine looks put together.  The challenge is finding things I already have that can successfully be used to achieve these looks.    
 
Ramping up for the Calgary Stampede which will be upon Calgary early July, my focus has circulated around fashion must haves and fashion looks to go hand in hand with the Country vibe for the summer.