Thursday, August 31, 2017

A lifetime love affair






Publishing indeed!  
I just adore magazines the same as the way I loved figure skating ... a quick bond and a lifetime love affair.  



August 2017 biggest accomplishment
As August 2017 comes crashing to an abrupt and disastrous halt.   I've taken in some quality movies and series, primarily from HBO. 





 Not surprising that HBO leads the pack (with Netflix nipping at their heels).  Not only was HBO an early disruption to network television, they also proved that there was a sophisticated, educated, and most likely upper income situated, who would flock to quality programs.

No, they didn't just become a reseller, they created content.  It is befitting that their great Game of Thrones is leading the buzz both online and in conversations, dinners, viewing events.




I had taken a sabbatical in life.  Withdrawing unto myself, with a deep reflection on the past.  Ironically, the highest KLOUT ranking than I'd had since KLOUT reinvented itself, causing a free fall of early adopter scores by at least 15 points.

Lucky for many, online marketers don't look at authenticity reinforcement like KLOUT or KRED scores.  That has something that has always puzzled me.  Particularly in Canada:  because these scores establish true influence, define audiences and decipher appeal of a profile.  Just log in with ideally your Twitter handle, then add your Facebook page, your PINTEREST boards and instaGRAMs etc. to connect everything together in one full swoop.

I received a personal email from one of my first real online connections, Mike Lehr, a couple of days ago and struggled with a response.



My greatest accomplishment
in August was achieving the highest mark on Solitaire from my computer.  Talk about mental shut down or just turning off my "give a damn meter" completely.

Granted, the highest mark in Klout Score for about 8 years is remarkable.  What is more amazing is I probably have spent a lot less time online.  

The beacon was there but my cloudy mood wasn't seeing it.  Sunglasses towards life.  Muted, darkened and cloaked in disguise.  Dwelling on the has beens, the should haves in the twilight of life.




Mike made mention of the tag leading him to the conclusion that I write a lot about those of us in our 50s and plus.  It is a fairly closed society I would admit, but not an exclusive one by any means.

Leading the helm being born in 1961:  when, according to either Boom, Bust & Echo or The Popcorn Report, it was the worst year thus far to have lived in.

I started reading about demographics in the early 80s .... I know, that time of YuppyDOM and YuppyHOOD - the stamp of coolness presented in the being you represented.




I admit to being a Yuppy of that era.  I admit to having puffed up bangs and during the week wearing a ladies suit attempting to clamber up the chain of career, not unlike the baby turtles climbing over each other to attempt to escape the pail in which they hatched from their shell.

I do write to so many of us that were born in the middle of bomb shelters and a United States invasion.  Nuclear war seemed eminent between the US and Russia.  The authors of those events, the greatest politicians the world had ever seen:  a storybook tale, among a loving family, loyal brotherhood, beautiful wife and charisma telling stories of hope, pride, and human-kindness to all people of all colors.

One of the few things that Mike said that made me think again:  whether my 50s have been a disappointment?  Uncanny, that love, friendship, life & family have been some of the best I've been lucky enough to have.   It has been the worst in my career in equal proportions.  That is a very frustrating circumstance to be in.  



You have the war stories, can regale heroic accomplishments, awards and rewards but somehow sucked into this hole that, like the turtles is hard to climb out of.

Depression and mental health issues must be alarming for anyone 50 or older.  Unlike your elder Baby Boomer siblings who have glided to the opposite spectrum of life:  Semi retired by 55, kids all university educated (without the debt load) because you were parented by those from the great depression era and had faced huge obstacles to get to the other side:  optimism, reward, recognition, service, loyalty, dedication, beliefs.

In similar fashion, and dipping into my fascination with numbers, I wonder how much financial foresight they had to have by when in order to fulfill many of us others wildest dreams.




Some of us got on a treadmill and forgot what gave us joy.  Too caught up on just making it through another day.  The pressures to not just keep up in the Yuppy attitude:  comparison and competition drive our segment.  Where our children have become entitled and tenacious.  Like Yuppies, Millennials know what is going on in their world:  the threats, the competition, the need for education, striving to get ahead in a very large age group.  

I'm lingering around the 1960s and older who are nipped at the edge of Baby Boomers who had all the best opportunities.  Waiting and learning, we had to observe, ask a lot of question, and act as a sponge, embracing lessons from others' failures, rapt with attention to their climb into iconic status:  Steve Jobs, Michael Jackson (watch it on HBO right now), who are admired and respected, after many years of disappointment, disillusion, accusations, failure.



Steve Jobs and Michael Jackson, the ones before us:  Baby Boomers, taught us valuable lessons and a common understanding:  the higher the achievement, the more likelihood of opposition, targeting, slander, dishonesty, suffering, monetary loss.  

Survival is key
Surviving is a critical characteristic we in our 50s share.  We've faced so many obstacles and had to start over more than once.  Or, had to rethink our own perspective and outlook.  Maybe change how we view the world, banishing bitterness to deep hole of the past.



Rebound, rejoice, rejuvinate
we have the energy to realize we still have a lot of youth in us along with knowledge accumulated by failure or lack of luck.  We've exercised our energy to levels that our technology dependent youngsters have become so reliant on, the likelihood of them being able to read a traditional clock, nondigital form, is rare.  We grew up with the basics, started with the basics, and able to conjure up some pretty cool answers to solving a lot of problems.



Once again, we're faced with much greater of forces of life:  no longer just war, struggle for power, and financial supremacy, today you have to worry about safety, violence, terror, corruption, like never before.

Conditioned as survivors
YUP! We Yuppies can set the tone, raise the bar, lead by example on life's greatest lessons.  In style, polished, educated, ethical and poised as our parents and grandparents instilled in us, not simply taught us.





Thursday, August 17, 2017

Happy healing and healthy being

When it seems like all other areas in your life are falling apart, there is only one thing you can possibly control:

HOW YOU REACT!








If you try to be the best person inside, true to your truest character, spectacular vibe and kindness to everyone ~ you HAVE the ability the change not only how you view the world, but also how the world views you.

After facing bullying myself for the first time in my life after turning 56 years old just this past April, I find strength building within me, not without the assistance of my therapist Marjory.

At this prime time age [ NIX the MIDDLE AGE already!] you have earned the right to be who you ARE!

Fashion 911 Board on Pinterest > SOURCE < Link


I'm not saying if you're a guy, you are aspiring to be a character cast permanently henceforth as the "grumpy old guy" or "old perv".  Nor am I suggesting that we women have to resort to comfy shoes only, bloaty tops with massive floral collage intended as a decoy to hide that post-menopausal early trimester pregnancy look [ that MOST women experience regardless of race, color, demographic  [= age + education + where you live], location, living conditions].

You MAY think if you wear those life-weary looks of drooling at really young girls or scowling at their belly buttons showing or deep enough cleavages that makes toe jam look like a speck of dirt.

What about testing my theory?
Be the truest you that you can possibly be!  There is no linkage or printed guides or rule books or user manuals or YouTube videos required.  Totally unique to you, wired closely between the head and the heart.  More close to your identity than your DNA.  You.

Who you were meant to be.
Forget about looking at the past.  Examining and spending so much agonizing energy on what ifs?  You CAN start to be you.  There is NEVER never enough time.  You do not need pocketfuls of money or unlimited VISA limits for shopping or pulling together your look.

Yes, it starts inside.
Nothing more difficult than asking yourself:  "What do you want?"  At my first therapy, recovering anxiety from the bullying experience, Marjory started with that simple question.

Journal til there's no ink left.
That was the instruction.  Start writing and writing and writing.  Regardless of what you are writing.  No judgement, complete privacy, just empty your heart and your head essentially is what I thought it meant.  Yeah, it took me outta my blogging, which has been mostly a release of the brain:  sharing what I know.

Helping people.
That's what I like doing most.  I tend to focus on avoiding the pitfalls that I've had to go through in order to clear the air and focus on moving forward.  By saying forward, I am meaning mostly that you are just .... 




LETTING GO ... 
..... letting go of the past.  With a big picture in mind, putting all the junk in a bubble:  lack of confidence, humble beginnings, shortfall in knowledge (aka lack of formal education), poor body image, horrible childhood, victimization, gender or race discrimination, divorce, violence, bullying, failure, disappointment, hurt ......... put it into the bubble [ aka journal if you need to about that stuff so that you can talk it over with a therapist ~ breaking the rules of letting it go ].  

THE BUBBLE FLOATS AWAY
Bouncing with the tide and blowing with the wind, the bubble has left you behind.  Now what are you going to do?

BE HONEST WITH YOURSELF
Now that you let all that toxic waste float away in the bubble, what do you have left?  Only YOU.  What does that look like, how do you look?  That's where the "What do you want?" steps in.

What do you want?
You can write and think all you like about lists upon lists of the little things to the gigantic dream.

"The bigger the dream,
   the more the hard work."
  ~ Jeannette Marshall 
    @optioneerJM 

No item too big or too small.
If it is what you want, it is what you want. Remember, in your private journal, it is YOU, it is private, it is between "Me, myself & I" if you need a debate or thrive on controversy go for it.

BIG DREAMS = HARD WORK
There are no short cuts for you skippies out there who like to dart around things and stomp on people to get to where they want to be.  What seems like an overnight miracle are years of perspiration:  that's what I extracted from watching THE NINETIES by CNN where its focus was really about the first kings of technology:  STEVE JOBS and BILL GATES.  Even if you want to lean towards sympathizing with the founders of NETSCAPE, stop it.  They earned millions of dollars on an idea they were able to execute.

EXECUTE ideas.
Don't just talk about it, give your ideas away, or work for a company who will gladly swipe that idea under the umbrella of corporate regulations and employment contracts:  what you create there becomes their property.

Life is unfair.
Get used to it.  Heck, if you're in your 40s or beyond you should know this by now and stop talking about it or how luck evaded you.

GET THINGS DONE
 Getting things done requires elbow grease or perspiration or agonizing or choices.  Checking things off mental lists that surface in the middle of the night when you are longing for slumber.  EXECUTE. Complete.  Finito.  Bon Voyage.  NEXT? Get'er'done already!

I got ahead of myself again, per usual.  Jump forward, bending sideways, and sometimes losing the very important point.  I guess that is the part of blogging that I really enjoy:  helping others and exhausting those thoughts that don't fit into a journal and may be better to share.

When I wrote what I wanted, it wasn't about material things, I am very fortunately married to Hunkster Hubster which I appreciate most days [ trials and tribulations of married life is normal ].  Sure, I'd love a much bigger house in a tropical locale with the web my biggest tool [ or hammer, depending upon my mood ].  

FOCUS ON THE POSITIVE
Was what I thought I really wanted.  Until you try it, you don't really realize or appreciate how difficult that is.  I think it was Oprah Winfrey probably in the 90s who got everyone thinking about having a GRATITUDE journal, whereby you wrote about what was positive that happened that day.  Even as you wake up, you can write down what you look forward to that day.

COGNITIVE BEHAVIOR 
I am at the very early, formative stage of doing cognitive behavior development.  With my baby toe on my right foot touching the tip hesitantly.  I hardly think it is possible without emptying the brain and the heart of anything toxic, and placing it in the bubble to float away.





Happy healing and healthy being,

Jeannette xo