Know the rules before you start communicating

There are often repetitive messages in my Meanderings, and it is rewarding when someone of superior intelligence grasps the meaning behind the messages.

Mike and I began our Social Media journey at about the same time (2010) ::... I was nudged a little harder over the cliff into the abyss slightly before him, and became what I thought as an unlikely mentor to someone who was highly successful and brilliant in his own right -- a successful book launch being a key metric that I recognized early on as a method to delve into credibility online among the endless noise and self-promotion of many self-described "experts".

Steadfast still, I am firmly entrenched in the belief that nobody can define themselves as an expert, no matter how many followers one has.  It is derived from how others describe you:  what do others consider you knowledgeable about is one thing, being credited as an expert quite largely another.

Mike reached out to me a couple of weeks ago via email, one of the few entrusted connections online that have never been derived from a face-to-face meeting at an event, social or association.  Not even a telephone conversation.

Having a virtual or personal conversation with a man who is not a relative, business associate is frowned upon as it can lead "to other things".  However, you can still be disciplined in having rich conversations and exchange of knowledge and learning from others regardless of gender.   There is an invisible line that should never be crossed.  

During a isolated time in my life when I was a regular church attendee, I still recall a message that resonates today from a wise Pastor:  do not be afraid to create friendships or be asked for advice from the opposite gender.  However, there are some areas to stay far from to keep it from falling into a downward, unethical spiral:

1. Include others in the conversation so that it is not isolated, clustered by only two (the Pastor suggested that he invites his wife to any meeting or event that he wants to avoid falling into the trap of questionable conversations, particularly marriage counselling).
2. It is okay to sprinkle in nuggets about your life partner, spouse, wife or husband, children, as a distinct flag that you are if not always happy, happiest with the person you are with and have no intention to stray.  Cheating is not at your core values.
3. Keep it professional so that at any given time, the conversation may be shared with a sibling, friend, child, parent, spouse, partner without any guilt.
4. Keep the topic off of relationship radars:  particularly complaints about your partner's shortcomings, dissatisfaction with your relationship in any shape or form.  That should be with your church minister or mosque elder.
5. You can have a respectful, fruitful relationship with a person of the opposite sex, when your radar clearly signals "in a committed relationship with not a sliver of disregard or disrespect of your life partner".
6. Any of these apply to anyone with leanings towards same sex or transgender relationships.

You CAN have helpful, rewarding relationships with anyone so long as you know your boundaries and it is clearly communicated by not so much by what you say but how you act.

SOCIAL MEDIA revisited FORECAST educated

I was wandering around social media, as I often do.  Living a country song in real life:  married to a Hunkster Hubster, my faithful companion Buddy [my Border Collie]; a productive week of sorts [battle my demon of "anxiety" caused by the realization that BULLYING is alive and well in some toxic corporate cultures that are so cloaked in manipulation and a play on words, causing it to be very difficult to prove::... EUREKA!  After a great deal of reading, researching on a potpourri of organizations, help associations, evaluations, discussions and distinguishable by authentication by psychologists, psychiatrists, therapists or medical practitioners ] they all basically agree that IF YOU THINK YOU ARE/HAVE BEEN BULLIED you likely are/have. ]

Take a look at this YouTube post by my content source favorite:  MASHABLE [which I reSHARE their content on Twitter faithfully, with never an acknow- ledgement of even a #RT never mind a #ThankYou hashtag on the feed.  Once, I had someone who was very observant that I tended to share @Mashable content consistently asked whether I belonged to Mashable.com or an affiliate of a compensated kind:  aka Brand Ambassador ].  


HEREIN is my comment, nestled among three really stupid ones ::... which makes me ponder if only gamers pay attention to Mashable.  Here I am a white, 50something, Canadian, Lady [how unique can one get on Social Media eh?] a solid follower of Mashable's since I can't remember when?  Likely, far at the beginning when I just grooved to the beat of their vibes from their posts:  unique, coolio, informative, positive or bizarre [pick your own perception of this really cool e-zine online!! ].  It is my intent to become a Brand Ambassador of sorts:  which usually include:

1.  Informative, helpful, unique, inspiring, bizarre content under one umbrella
2.  A cache of intellectually stimulating content
3. Attractive to a distinct, talented crew of writers, assemblers and ensemble 
4. Provides a wealth of information to sop up and absorb
5. Has created a groove and a beat that resounds among a hipster or yuppy
6. Is unrelated to race, country, politic, faith, color, educated or economics
7. Has the gift of the spirit of sharing by creating share-friendly buzz
8. Is more about the name "Mashable" than any singular contributor, artist, writer, innovator, video, mainstream oriented - NOT - material
9. Eye catching wording or visuals, it begs to be clicked on 
10.  Appeals to the curious, knowledge junkies, innovative, creative types.

Have a look with my comment after you take a look at the video link:

Brilliant!!  [ HEY! Who are the Bozos commenting here? ] I noticed the clear tribute to Hyatt which is signifying that this was "sponsored by" Hyatt ::.... which in social media terms means:  "PAID for by" .... I think that authenticity and credibility would go a far longer way if every Brand Ambassador, Blog, Website or Social Media Brand [ think:  instaGRAM as what I consider "the universal endorsement" social media site ] ::.... if it was REQUIRED to show in Profile that u are paid by a Brand 4 what U tweet or share.  


Another gem I uncovered while letting the content follow through on the headline after garnering a click:

It's no wonder the most prolific personalities or brands online are actively followed and sought.  There is so much abundance of information that allows you to discover a deeper insight to your own being by what attracts you and then ultimately you attract in kind.  

A giving bunch who belong to the inner sanctuary of the giving kind.  Not of financial means, more often abundance thin by monetary value but rich beyond imagination by having something in common:  helping others or helping the world become a better place.  

By observing your own stats with some sort of frequency, if not any kind of regularity, you can reach and get in touch with what others want to hear from you about.  Mine have been sitting there as plain as day or the sparkle of sunshine.  Understanding what it means is a great discovery.

Take a look at the numbers.  My consistent mass hails from Brazil.  Maybe a sign that this is the place where my soul aligns.  Or, if more pragmatic, objective observation is where you're inclined, the simple fact that Google's blogspot features easily translation, that removes restriction of reach by language distinction.

Brazil loves and keeps on giving the love to "Build a 30-60-90 Day Plan".  More instructional than philosophical, it lays out how to do just that.  Even to this day, Google is often my best online friend.  As it gets to know me, successful results abound.  Closer to what I have had in mind then my mind knew.

Taking a queue from my faithful crowd:  what is the content they most enjoy or find of value?  The ingredients to a successful sales path.  Less philosophizing and more educational.  You have a feel for what you are looking for whenever you are creating the content, the report, the analysis, the research, yet until you see it emerge does it create a spotlight.

I will proceed in the coming days on writing a more instructional blog on how to forecast accurately and consistently ::.... primarily geared towards the sales professional or those that aspire to be.

Make new friends, love the old

one is silver and the other GOLD
as I grow each older, the more appreciative I've become of so many wonderful experiences to be blessed with, never for a moment taking any of it for granted.

working one's self to the core 
doesn't do anyone favors (p.s. in Canadianese the American favors is favored by spell check, but we Canadians taught articulation in the late 60s and the early 70s were blessed with the very big gift of expression. ..... :: anywayyyyyyyyyyyyyys [an 80s term for those yuppies still out there, and the Millennial wannabes ::.... how things have evolved eh?

In the folds of being born of the 60s
like wallflowers to the Baby Boomers, we observed, we absorbed the best parts, we have held our composure, and now we are parents of the gift to our generation:  the gift of the Millennial Bloom.  

We're pretty lucky
even though if you paid attention to statistics and stereotypical behavior, those born in the 60s were pre-packaged to lean towards failure.  If you think stereo-typing is dangerous, especially to mental health, think of the resilience and tenacity of anyone you know, been lucky enough to have met, or heaven help you if you're an offspring.

A beacon of light
to the Millennials is their embrace of the 80s culture.  Is it because there is a soul connection of what those of us in our 20s in the 80s aligned with what our own Millennials are facing.

Where optimism can be restored
when you think of what great things, events, game-changers occurred in the 80s, introduced back then, every day now.  

Boxers who come out of the corner
jumping into the obstacle ahead, head of, crouched in readiness to take the offensive with hardly a sniffle and long before a drop of sweat.  That would define those who lived their 20s in the 80s.  

I graduated from college in the 80s
and it was a great platform to launch a career.  Not limited by the restrictive curriculum, more persevering to land beyond the world of conformity, censorship, polite manners, poise and abloom with everything is impossible, we may as well make the impossible possible.

I notice some really talented folks out there.  Some that mere names crossed paths with me.  What a crazy, crazy CRAZY time, when I think back to it.  With gurgling reflection caught and captured from my conversation with my mother this afternoon.

Being the parent of a Millennial
is a worrisome, full board, attentive preoccupation.  You revel is the brilliance shining from your child born, first in 1989, with the others to follow in the 90s.  

We're lucky so they are lucky
as well.  Like skipping stones across a glass-like lake or quietly lapping ocean shore.  We may have been born in inopportune times, faced some pretty insur-mountable odds.  What we share is that grasp of not expecting anything for free, without commitment, not always sacrifice [ often by choice ] understanding the basic rightful work ethic:  

* work hard
* work honestly
* work with integrity
* be known for your word without all the numerous
* be committed to quality

* whatever you do, do it with pride

* love who you do it with, who you're surrounded by

* do your best always, it always pays off in spades

A dog eat dog world 
began with the Baby Boomers with entitlement mastered by GenX.  Where those born of the 60s, grew in the 80s, parents of the Millennials >> skipped >> over the hay days and landed in the middle of the first recession since the 1929 stock market crash [ if you do not know anything about this historical event, pause this article and go find out about it .... as my commitment to you as a blogger, you read ] we had to survive.  Really not much opportunity to learn as funds dried up and kids had to go leave post-secondary because their was some sort of crisis in their lives, with their family, that took more important measure instead.

Learn from your elders
as much as you can.  No time will be wasted.  I can guarantee that!  Talking to my mother, with so many wise words shared.  I even said to her:  "I hope I remember all of this for when I write later".  The gift of her wisdom was shone brightly upon me, like a face of a flower blooming forward towards the sun.  

I was a sponge in the 80s
that was my greatest gift.  I only had a college diploma, not even a university degree.  It was enough to teach me discipline and that anything worthwhile doesn't come free, without commitment and stick-to-it-ness that is just emerging within the Millennial generation.  

Millennials have faced fear
reflected in their parents eyes.  A strong, tough upper lip, and a straight spine.  We weren't even considering weakness, with goals clearly defined in our line of vision.  

Dedication, optimism ~
contagiously positive attitudes were bestowed upon our offspring.  Whether they grasped those sprinkles of enlightenment and hung on to the best qualities we shared.

Nobody is perfect
and neither is anyone who defines themselves as a Yuppie.  [ Or admits in select company and trusted members ] Who wear it as an emblem of pride, saying "who cares?" if they still have enough hair left to grow a mullet, why not?

As the Millennials groan
and tsk tsk with embarrassment to their very influential peers.  What their peers think of them is more important than their parents, their boyfriend, or their employer slash / boss could ever dream.  A peer sets the benchmark and the height of the peddle stool they are awarded, acclaimed, worshiped or refrained.

Be still thine parental heart
it is just a mutation of your chromosomes, evolved and collided with nature and environment to form an independent being, an individual.  I know it is very hard.  Like a moth does to a butterfly without the loss of the moth, is the butterfly allowed to form.

Be glad, be proud and be boastful
toward anyone who'll listen.  Those are the ones you want to be around.  They can relate, or your words resonate with them.

Unlike my mom's words
this afternoon.  They were so wise, so enlightening ... almost as though I was leaving a cocoon.    While I'd been living these 55 years, I was enclosed in a small outlook, not looking far beyond to where flowers bloom and the sun's flower is warm with a gentle wind, with an iced tea at my elbow.  I'm careful I don't give it a nudge to topple it over as I tap, tap, tap with the rhythm of my 1979 typing class on an electric typewriter.  Graduating exceeding 120 clicks minutes  ::.... now WHAT was it called back in those days when we took our speed tests on a manual typewriter?  Hmmmm I think it was ... nope not characters per second, or any variation of the Times New Roman font that was the only letters to be had, to write a letter, draw up an agreement or a contract.  

Some of us grew up with carbon copy
yet how many know what that material is?  What it is like to try to avoid staining your fingers on the sticky substance on its back with a wrapping-paper thin or thinner-than-onion paper thin [ I'm sure Google can show you what either of those things are .... if not, Wikipedia for sure ].

This is a story for those 
who remember the glory of being a yuppie.  Bringing in the 80s as we all turned 20.  That is a pretty unique identifiable experience, a uniqueness we can own.  A significant contribution to our society came from our decade.  [ you may have to dig back to my other INBETWEENERs blog (before we evolved to be called "YUPPYDOM" ) mere weeks ago I wrote about those who graduated from the 1960s and became icons of our time.  Across borders, beliefs, colors, race or country, the class of the 1960s born are unique with much to boast about.

Keep steady on the present.
Slam the door or gently close the past.  Forget about the future because it isn't anything you can touch right now.  So you may as well be aware of the present and make every moment count!

where everything is impossible, 

we may as well make the 

impossible possible

~Jeannette Marshall

TRUST your instincts

The trials of being 50+ can be eye popping, especially so if you are a woman.

Jeannette Marshall

10 mins · 

I was just getting prescriptions filled less than a week ago after seeing the doctor for an annoying recurring bug (first laryngitis type virus then nauseous); it occurred to me to mention it to the doctor but I didn't, but remembered and asked the pharmacist: my husband had a small case of shingles in his back beneath his shoulder blade: he said that shingles is NOT contagious; The day before last during a meeting excusing during the discussion, saying I didn't know what was going on. Thankfully, yesterday was a day off because, even though I grumbled about missing the Super Bowl, I had swapped Sunday's 9 to 5 shift instead of an ugly 2pm to 10pm shift. My skin started to erupt and today it almost looks like I am a burn victim. I wasn't even thinking shingles, but when the Hunkster Hubster had shingles, I did what most of us do: look it up on the internet. Let me emphasize that I do not condone self-diagnosis, always rule to see a doctor first. (I was taught this while my Awesome SONster was in and out of the hospital a lot as a baby)! To top THAT off, I had been invited for a video interview for a career position (not a job, like I am in now) with an international sustainability corporation (the environment is something I'm passionate about - please go to my optioneerJM blog where I wrote about how to use normal household objects instead of expensive manufactured, packaged, designed, marketing overhead products. Because I consider my main focus groups: INBETWEENERS (born 1960 to 1965, after the Baby Boomers, before Generation X, while likely parents of Millennials) ..... so here I am with this erupted sore face, I had to slather it with tons of foundation to try to hide it with massive amounts of cover up ..... wishing for the best: one thing I said in the video was a wholehearted response: just doing this video interview while I have a severe allergic reaction on my face, should demonstrate that I can bounce back from set backs. So later on this afternoon while I am waiting for my family to come home and stop over to celebrate my Awesome SONster's birthday; 28th birthday......... read more on meanderingsABOUT 

I came online to ask Google the question:  "Can you get Shingles on your face?" and a plethora of information abounded.  I read some of the symptoms and it registered with me to go beyond to take a look of the images of Shingles on faces ...... pretty GROSS is an understatement.  I WAS able, however, to find one that mirrored my own face.  In fact, mine appears a lot more drastic.  Trust me, it may be slightly redder from putting cover up and mega tons of foundation to cover up for the video interview I had on my agenda this afternoon.  That, and preparing for my Awesome SONster's 28th Birthday celebration.  Not any lazing around.

YES you CAN get #shingles on your face!!  

My lesson for the day:  trust your instincts.  If it is anything other than Shingles I will update my blog.

This was me a week ago.

Lesson to you:  If you are over 50, get the Shingles vaccine.  If I had been given the proper information less than a week ago, I may have gotten the vaccine that very day.  Less than a week later, ironically they must be contagious, just like chicken pox are.

Shingle Alert

Thanks Donna, I just got home from Dr who confirmed it is Shingles. I wrote about it on my MEANDERINGSabout blog and posted this uncomplimentary picture that has horrified my family to create awareness that it is CONTAGIOUS and very painful. Anxiety is the highest contributor in my case. I took two months off work this summer, the first time in a career spanning 40 years -- I can say that because I got my first job at a newspaper when I was 15, because if I wanted to continue figure skating, I had to contribute financially to the ice times, private lessons, tests, competitions, skates and dresses (most top contending figure skaters come from very affluent backgrounds typically because it is almost an elitist sport for the well off, a beacon for affluence similar to that of tennis. READ more on MEANDERINGSabout http://meanderingsabout.blogspot.ca/

an epic ZITcom

A makeover of the RED kind

I haven't appealed to my fashionista persona for a while.  Since this is my third day off in a row, I decided to do a radical makeover and share with you the steps I am taking in case it is something you want to do as well.

Today, I am going to transform from my natural "dirty blond" or light brunette hair color to an eye-popping RED.  I sure hope it turns out well.  

I asked a young gal cashier who had flaming red hair whether she thought it would suit me and she said YES!  (well, she said, with my eyes ... blush, aw shucks).  I've had two forms of temporary red color in my cabinet for quite some time.  Somewhere around Halloween, I think.

This is definitely going for the gusto.  Not something anyone timid would attempt, to be sure.  

What I look like on a "normal" day

A spa day
of a new kind.  I haven't treated myself to a self-pampered day for quite a while.  Thank you for joining me, especially if you decide to try it along with me.

The BEFORE before the after
I apologize if I've scared you.  It is necessary to do the "before" like any other makeover.  I've already forewarned my stepdaughter should the Hunkster Hubster show up on her doorstep with suitcase in tow from the shock.  Guys don't like their women reinventing themselves too often or too drastically.  

Cleansing
is a must in any ritual to keep healthy, happy skin.  Unfortunately, I've had this big zit on my cheek since just before my stepdaughter's wedding last August!  I had to pull out a lot of different concealers for the wedding photos.  I've tried to tackle it for 6 months now, in an epic ZITcom. 

A face masque
After I use the OXY pads (sounds like a home cleaning product I should be using to do chores doesn't it?)

A face mask while coloring

Ruby red
I bought Schwarzkopf's ruby red on the darker side, with my blonde, light hair color, I want to avoid it turning pink.  Also, I am keeping in mind that I have the temporary color as a back up to add later if it does go haywire during the color.  I've kept it on for 30 minutes before I shop into the shower.  (I'm nervous now).

 It's all about the base
Before I get started on any foundation or styling hair (I usually go air dry unless sprucing up for a special occasion).  I have mentioned before that I use Oil of Olay for sensitive skin, faithfully after I wash or shower.  I use coconut oil on my hair while wet to help prevent my hair from drying out from home coloring remedies.

I've discovered this RIMMEL BB Cream since my "ZITcom" erupted a month or so ago.  It gives me a smooth finish and does a fantastic job of covering up the imperfections (which are plenty once you hit 50!)

I use a QUO TM to smooth it on.  It does a decent job of it.  Even though the ZIT is still there, it is less noticeable to my eye.

The red hair doesn't look too bad.  In fact, it did turn out to be the color I expected.  My hair is thinning at the front forehead so a side part comb over helps.  You may have noticed the eyebrows are hanging on to my natural color, but I have a fix it for that.  After I use some concealer under the eyes and dotted on the zits to give a better coverage.  I seal it with a powder to avoid shine or smear marks.  It helps to set the foundation for extended coverage.

Eyebrows framed
I have experimented a lot in this area because I have faint eyebrows.  It is more important than anything.  If I were to stop here and just apply lipstick, I'd be free to accept surprise guests or a shopping trip.  (Do you ever notice how much more attentive boutique sales are when you are all made up?  If you want help, don't go shopping in sweats and looking like you're about to tackle housework).

I clip my eyebrows very short with nose hair scissors (that I don't use on nose hairs, gimme a break!).  I find that if they are shorter, they will grab the eyebrow product much better.  I outline my eyebrows in a color that closely matches my own.  If I am just shopping or going to work, that is suffice.  Today, I'm using the darker product to bring out my eyes.

Green eyes and purple eye color
go hand in hand, according to all beauty reports.  I tend to wear eye color scheme according to the tone of my outfit.  For example, if I'm wearing read, I would use nude tones.  For this make up makeover, I am relying on my trusted QUO palette and dual contouring + eye liner.  There is lots of information out there on what color to use to compliment your eyes.  For example, blue works wonders with brown eyes.   Try it out, and if it works, keep it part of your regular routine.  As you get used to it, you'll become faster at doing a quick brush of makeup before you're off and on your way.  Typically, my makeup regime is 10 minutes max.  If I fuss with my hair, add another 20 or 30 minutes, depending on what I do.  I ventured into a short cut lately, which is easily maintained.  I cropped it short because I was constantly tying it back which wasn't necessarily a good look for me if I wasn't curling, moussing and blow-drying to tendrils.

The cheek bone is connected
to where you put a light dusting of blush.  I don't put much on.  Those eyebrows look too dark to me ... hmmmm.

Bat outta eyelash hell
Thick, full eyelashes is something I grapple with.  I wrote about my misadventures in eyelash extensions before.  I use an eyelash foundation/mascara combination, with the best so far being from L'Oreal.  I tried MAC's but haven't found it as great as MAC mascara-like eyebrow definer.  This is probably what takes me the longest.  My own eyelashes are long, but I have to work at it to make them thicker, fuller.  I learned this trick from my stepdaughter (the other two rarely wear makeup, yeah that's lucky for them, that and youth) to use multiple types of mascara.  I have to use waterproof kinds otherwise they weep and I turn into a raccoon.

I've been framed 
To complete the look, you need lipstick.  You'll notice that I have not been blessed with full, luscious lips like my youngest daughter (I'm still trying to figure out where that gene came from because she was blessed with it).  I really like the kind that are lipstick and liner in one with a sealer over top.  

Similar to mascara, lip liner can bleed on my lips and look like I'm a 5-year-old attempting to use her mom's makeup.  

VOILA!
A beauty queen, I'll never be.  Trying to make the most of what gifts I've been given, I max out on my eyes which are my best feature, or so I've been told.  My youngest daughter and sister have asked me aloud why they weren't bestowed with green eyes.  Well, looking at the pictures with no makeup and a horrible zit, demonstrates a trade off because they both have wonderful skin.